Same-Sex Parents

Among the most-protested books on the shelves of libraries and schools in the United States this year is an illustrated retelling of a true story about Same-Sex Parenting. And Tango Makes Three tells of the time when two male penguins at the New York Zoo partnered together to hatch an egg and give a young penguin a start in life as a same-sex partnered family.

In Utah, same-sex couples are suing to get the state to recognize their rights to a parental relationship with their spouses toward their children. One married couple has a child born to one of the mothers by artificial insemination. The state will not recognize her partner’s rights as a natural mother to the child as well, although it would be automatic in cases where the other partner in the marriage is a man.

Another couple, married in New York, has adopted a child. Only one parent is given full parental rights, while the other must go through maddeningly complex red tape to approach some sort of parental parity with her partner with respect to their child in the eyes of the law.

Story of Same-Sex Penguin Partners Inflames Emotions

The rankings of the most-complained-of books are based on actual complaints in writing that have been filed with schools and public libraries throughout the country during the year. There have been some consistent titles on the list, such as the same-sex penguin partners, that are repeating near the top of most-objected titles. Number one on the list this year is Sherman Alexie’s novel The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-time Indian, first published in 2007, which also repeats a place on the ALA’s list of books that garner the most complaints in the year.

All Families Deserve Recognition and Respect Under the Law

The Utah case of Kitchen v. Herbert established the principle that the state must extend equal marriage rights to all couples. Experts in the law note that the ruling applicable to marriages in that case should also include the notion that parental rights are governed by the same logic. The truth, though, is that state agencies often do not accord the same rights and respect to same-sex partners that they do to male and female spouses. Lawyers for the ACLU and other groups argue that such unequal treatment before the law has no place in the twenty-first century legal landscape of marriage equality.

Recognizing Rights to Love

Whether it is penguins making parenting choices that some see as unusual or even offensive in their portrayal in a picture book, or whether it is same-sex human couples in many states in the country who desire to raise children in a loving and welcoming home with two parents sharing parental rights and responsibilities, there are those who want to draw boundaries around parenting and fit it into a box that conforms to their definition of ‘family’ or of ‘parent’ or even of ‘love.’

While some want to hold back time and not allow reality to intrude on their vision of a life that does not include certain aspects that make them uncomfortable, the truth is that society in general is making strides toward tolerance, inclusion, and equality that are ultimately more beneficial for all. The culture that encourages diversity, openness, and love over exclusion, secrecy, and intolerance is one that is healthier and happier in general.

Opening to Love

As people and societies mature and expand their awareness, they see more commonalities than differences among people, as well as among all species of life on the earth, and especially among all the families that are based in love. Despite different outward appearances and distinct habits and customs, all people share much more in common than they have things separating them from one another as they grow toward understanding, tolerance, and equality for all.