As a wedding vendor, you play an important role in one of the happiest days of a couple’s life. Whether you’re a photographer, a caterer, a baker, or a seamstress, people depend on your skills to help make their wedding day one that they’ll cherish forever. LGBTQ couples can legally marry throughout the United States and are looking for talented vendors to make their nuptials a dream come true. Here are some things you should know about being an LGBTQ-friendly wedding vendor.

Lead With Respect

LGBTQ persons are often subjected to hostility and disrespect when seeking services. It’s always a good practice to treat all customers with respect, but this is especially true for queer and trans people. Be mindful when communicating with potential clients.

• Don’t assume gender identity or sexuality. Imagine making an assumption and referring to someone by the wrong gender or sexual orientation. Misgendering someone is extremely rude and may turn off a potential customer. Avoid assuming gender roles based on expressions of masculinity or femininity. Always ask.
• Pronouns matter. Similarly, you should ask a client about personal pronouns regardless of how he, she, or they are presenting.
• Treat LGBTQ+ customers the same way you would straight couples. Even with same-sex marriage legal, many couples still face obstacles in getting hitched. Don’t make assumptions about their experiences based on sexual orientation or gender identity.

Watch Your Language

Weddings, especially in Western societies, are based on heteronormative traditions and gender roles. Therefore, from cake toppers to reception customs, you should be mindful of using gendered language in your contracts and communications. Replace terms such as “husband,” “wife,” “bride,” and “groom” with gender-neutral terms where possible. No LGBTQ+ couple wants to go through a contract scratching out terms that don’t apply. This language check also applies to your online communications. Watch out for verbiage and themes that reinforce a male-female binary or other gender norms on your website, emails, and social media profiles.

Walk the Walk

Be intentional about being an LGBTQ-friendly vendor. Queer couples are looking for vendors like you. They shouldn’t have to wonder or guess about your business. If you need to expand your business, reach out to actual LGBTQ+ couples and, with their permission, feature them in images for your website and social media. If you have a physical location, add signage that lets customers know you’re safe to work with. Be sure to advertise your services in LGBTQ+ magazines, community centers, and websites. If you partner with other businesses, look for ones that are openly friendly to queer, trans, and nonbinary persons.

Mind Your Internalized Phobias

We all have our own biases and prejudices that we’re unconscious of. Does the tone of your voice or body language change when you’re talking to gay or trans people? Why? Have you made assumptions about the design sensibilities or tastes based on a client’s orientation or identity? Even “positive” stereotypes such as gay men having an eye for design or lesbian women committing to marriage quickly can be harmful, especially when they’re not true. Many people in LGBTQ+ communities are sensitive to being judged. Your verbal and nonverbal communication may be sending a different message.

Support LGBTQ People Sincerely

From a business standpoint, serving queer couples makes dollars and cents as well as sense. If you offer your services to everyone, that means more clients and more profit. You’re in business to make money, but people value sincerity. Supporting LGBTQ couples should come from the heart, not your financial ledger. 

Being an LGBTQ-friendly wedding vendor requires action to match your intentions. There are queer couples who need your talents for their special day. Do whatever you can to make it easy for them to find you.