Crafting personalized wedding vows can be a lovely way to make your ceremony more meaningful for you and your guests. However, some couples add in details that can alienate the audience or make people feel downright uncomfortable. You should write your vows from the heart, but there are some points that you should avoid completely. Review these tips and learn more about common mistakes you should avoid when creating your wedding vows. 

Past Relationships

Some couples meet after getting out of long or problematic relationships. No matter how integral a former partner might be to getting you to your current place in life, you do not need to include this person in your vows. The words you write should be about the love you share with your significant other. They shouldn’t be about the challenges you went through before reaching this point. Even a humorous quip about a first marriage that failed can make your family and friends feel incredibly awkward. 

Other People

It is also important to avoid talking about other people too much in your vows. Maybe your sister introduced the two of you, or your grandfather played a big part in bringing your wedding day to fruition. Though giving a quick nod can be a sweet gesture, avoid talking about other people for too long. Vows need to be concise, meaning it is best to focus most of the content around the love you share with each other. 

Inside Jokes

While your vows are meant to capture the unique nature of your relationship, you will be delivering them in front of a crowd of people. If guests don’t understand the many references you’re making, you can bet that they will be bored or confused throughout the ceremony. Adding a ton of inside jokes to your vows can be tempting. Try to be as sparing as possible with these additions. If you really want to write a speech that only your partner will understand, create separate vows that you exchange with each other the night before the wedding. 

Difficult Periods

People go through many ups and downs before deciding to get married. If your relationship went through difficult periods in the past, you don’t want to include these details in your vows. Though there is nothing wrong with bringing up obstacles that you have faced together over the years, don’t linger too long on these points. Guests may feel uneasy if you mention the fact that you took a break or separated for a prolonged period of time before deciding to get engaged. 

Sexual Exploits

Being physical with your significant other is likely a big part of your relationship. Still, you don’t want to discuss any stories that center around your sex life. Keep your audience in mind at all times when writing your vows. Do you really think that your parents or siblings want to hear about the first time you were intimate with your partner? 

Rude Comments

Making light of your own shortcomings can often be a cute way to add some humor to your vows. For example, you may say, “I promise to always do the dishes,” when it is a known fact that your housework skills leave something to be desired. What you don’t want to do is make any rude comments about your partner. Even bringing up an innocent anecdote about how your significant other is always late to everything can create palpable tension. Focus on the positives of your relationship and what makes your partner special to you.

Deciding to write your own vows can easily make your wedding ceremony feel special. As long as you know what topics to avoid, you will have no trouble crafting an exchange that is as touching and unique as the love you share.