The concept of the wedding shower dates back to Holland in the 16th century. Basically, a bride whose family couldn’t afford a dowry was thrown a party. At this party family and friends could provide support in the form of gifts and money. The basic idea remains the same in modern times. Now it’s common for both members of the couple to take part in the celebration and be showered with presents. Whether you’re planning a wedding shower for yourself or for a couple you love, these tips will offer insight into some of the biggest planning questions you may have. 

What To Know About Basic Shower Etiquette

According to custom, a wedding shower is typically thrown by family members or friends who are close to the couple. However, tradition dictates that parents are not usually in charge of this event. Since many parents help cover costs associated with the wedding itself, the financial responsibilities for the shower often fall to siblings, grandparents, or friends who are a part of the wedding party. In some cases, the bridesmaids and groomsmen will work together to throw the shower and share the costs. 

In more recent decades, it has become acceptable for couples to throw their own showers. This is most often the case when a couple doesn’t want to burden others with the planning responsibilities or has a specific vision for how the party should go. 

Who To Invite When Planning a Wedding Shower

Since the main focus of a shower is to offer gifts to the couple, most people are frugal with their guest lists. Inviting too many people can seem like a plot for presents. To prevent this perception, it’s best to keep the event as small as possible. You should ask immediate family members and all those included in the wedding party to attend. According to etiquette, you should only invite to the shower people who will receive or have received an invitation to the wedding. If you’re planning a wedding shower for a couple, have a preliminary discussion about who to include. 

When To Throw the Wedding Shower

From engagement parties to bachelor and bachelorette outings, the months leading up to a wedding can be packed with events. If you’re throwing a shower, you need to know when is best to schedule the gathering. Most experts state that this party should be held anywhere from three months to two weeks before the wedding. Unless the shower will be a surprise for the couple, it’s best to discuss what dates work for them. You should always mail out invitations to the shower about four to six weeks beforehand.

Where To Host the Event

Since a wedding shower is typically an informal event, it isn’t always necessary to host the gathering in a public location like a restaurant or party venue. If the guest list is small enough and you have the accommodations, there’s nothing wrong with hosting the gathering from the comfort of your home. A party held at someone’s house tends to capture a relaxed and comfortable vibe.

How To Entertain During a Shower

Though the main focus of the wedding shower is celebrating the couple’s upcoming nuptials and providing them with gifts, you may want to keep guests entertained in other ways. In recent years, partaking in party games has become a popular way for people to enjoy themselves at a shower. When guests don’t know each other too well, consider icebreaker activities to help alleviate social awkwardness. Games themed around the couple can also be fun, like trivia questions or customized crossword puzzles. 

Wedding showers have not changed too much since first coming into practice several centuries ago. Still, it’s always best to familiarize yourself with basic etiquette in order to host a gathering that hits all of the right marks.