Personalizing a wedding ceremony is often a bit more of a challenge to couples than making adjustments to the reception. This is largely due to how cut-and-paste many ceremonies are, with officiants going through the motions and guests waiting for the inevitable “I do” to signify the transition from ritual to party. Of course, you may not want your ceremony to feel like a drag. For plenty of couples, the best way to put a custom spin on the affair is by adding one or more unity rituals to the mix. 

Unity ceremonies are an extra step in modern weddings that imbue a bit more personal significance to the event. The goal is to create a moment that represents the joining of two people on a symbolic level. If this sounds intriguing, here’s some examples of how to make unity rituals a core component of your ceremony. 

Lighting the Candle

Perhaps the most commonplace ritual of this variety is the lighting of the unity candle. How this works is simple: Both people are given smaller candles during the ceremony. Placed between the couple is one large candle. Then the couple comes together to light the wick of the single candle from their separate flames. The symbolism showcases how something new is coming from two sources. Couples will sometimes ask parents to take part in the ritual to highlight the joining of two families. 

Circling One Another

Unity rituals often spring from older traditions that were popular in the past for various reasons. In Judaism, for example, there is a wedding custom that involves the couple circling each other during the ceremony. According to tradition, the act of circling one’s partner seven times is believed to create a ring of protection. This will keep the couple shielded from harm as they begin married life. Modern couples of all faiths have adopted this custom as a part of their unity ceremonies, with family members and friends sometimes joining the circle to add to the protective energy. 

Pouring the Sand

Though it might be the more popular visual representation of a union, lighting a candle is far from the only way to symbolize this milestone moment. For couples who want something less on the nose, there is the alternative of pouring sand as a unity ritual. The couple takes separate jars of sand and pours them into an empty container. The grains of sand blend together seamlessly, showcasing how the couple will now be joined as one. Some ceremonies use colored sand to add an extra bit of visual appeal to the ritual. 

Tying the Hands

Handfasting is one of the oldest recorded wedding traditions still practiced in modern times. The ritual involves the hands of the couple being bound together with a ribbon or string. Handfastings were once used as the centerpiece of ceremonies. Now couples more commonly add them to their ceremony as a unity ritual. Consider using fabric with sentimental significance, like a baby blanket or strip of a grandmother’s wedding gown, as a way of giving the moment an added emotional component.

Planting the Seeds

It has often been said that marriage is like a garden, as a couple needs to tend to the relationship for it to prosper. If you want to take this concept to a literal level, consider planting seeds with your partner as a unity ritual. Though the plant will not sprout immediately, the symbolic act can make for a perfect addition to outdoor events or for couples who consider themselves nature enthusiasts. 

Though not a necessary component of a wedding, a unity ritual can add a lot to your big day. Review a variety of examples to come up with a ceremony idea that showcases the importance of the moment.